can't sleep!

so somehow I couldn't sign in to my original blog (http:/braindisturbed.bogspot.com) for the past, let's say, month, so that's one of the reasons I couldn't write. Anther reason is that I've hardly had anytime to be alone for a long long time.
I recently discovered that I don't really function very well when I'm around people all the time, I need my time alone to zone out and recharge my battery. I've been on vacation with a few friends, and it's basically a once in a lifetime experience that I'm having right now, but somehow in the middle of all of this I seem to get one of my depressin fits; I just don't wanna be around anyone!
you know when you're somewhere new and you wanna see everything and go everywhere and do all that is to do, well that's how my friends have been (that's how any normal person would be!) but not me. at one point I was this close to either killing one of them or slitting my own wrist! my friends are so uptight about keeping the "group" as one unit, they wanna do everything together, I swear to God if it was up to them we'd be going to the bathroom together! hey we don't wanna break the group do we?!
I an't be like that, I always need sometime alone, no matter how I like them, no matter how comfortable I am around them that doesnt mean I can be with them 24/7 and still be okay with it! I need my own time, and that's just how I am.
if they wanna fight about it and call me a bitch well by all means be my guest because that's what I turn into when I don't get my time! (Grrr.. woof woof)
I'm not really asking for much, all I want is to be left alone when I ask to be!
I know I sound so unfair... but you know what? right now I don't really care about anything!