not one more word!

I had to sit and bite my tongue as she lectured me about how a muslim should be!
I sat and sat, listening to her endless speech of me being a BAD muslim, just because she saw a jacket I bought! who cares if it was faded jeans?! I only bought it cause I liked it! but no! she thinks I bought it because I'm "blindly" following into the footsteps of jewish fashion (oh my God, am I gonna get into trouble here?! lol) anyways, she pissed me off when she started talking about how people just follow fashion without even thinking about it, and she started giving examples of how everyone wore baggy pants when they were "in", but now everyone wears lowrise pants (oh God) and she was like "if wearing loose clothes became the look, everyone would go around wearing them" well excuse me, I'm not strong enough to walk around wearing a tent (I don't mean to get disrespectful here) I know what she's doing is totally right, and she's a lot better muslim than I ever will be. but that gives her NO right to judge who I am because she doesn't like the way I dress!!!
I can't go through discussions about my hegab not being proper when I have problems keeping my prayers! you have to have priorities. I'm sorry, but I can't be more "decent looking" (call it what you may) if I have guy friends whom I see and talk to, I can't wear a 3baya (or even loosen up my clothes a little bit) and go to the movies, I can't stop plucking my eyebrows when I still have a boyfriend for heaven's sake! what is she thinking?
it's not about fashion! it's not about islam! it's about me, all me!
I am pretty decent in the way I dress, so what if my shirt is sometimes tight I hardly have any boobs for crying out loud! there's nothing seductive about me now that I'm mo7agabba! she should see me wothout hegab, then she would really flip out!!! I mean c'mon people, one step at a time!!!!
GOD!
I really am trying here, I've had my times with looking ugly and wearing clothes three times my size... now, I am a paranoid over self-conscious freak who wants to look good, and she is in NO place to push me to do what she thinks is right! my mother quit that a while ago! just because she thinks she's a good muslim doesn't mean she has the right to enforce her beliefs of me burning in hell!
what really pissed me off the most is that I had to sit there and say nothing, because mostly I know she's right. but now when I think about it, I feel like such an idiot just sitting there defending myself against her when I was supposed to tell her that I was none of her business!
but still, I didn't wanna fight with her, she's still dear to me. and I think one of us yelling was enough... we ended up joking about it, but I know there's always this line of unacceptance between us...
but I guess you do wha you have to do to keep the boat floating.